


Jo, Not So Much a Plumber

by ireallyhatecornnuts (CharleyFoxtrot)



Series: Idjits Assemble [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Avengers Fusionfic, Destiel - Freeform, Idjits Assemble, M/M, hinted-at destiel - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-31
Updated: 2013-05-31
Packaged: 2017-12-13 14:07:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/825153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CharleyFoxtrot/pseuds/ireallyhatecornnuts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor gets a nicely gender-ambiguous nickname.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jo, Not So Much a Plumber

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the first ficlet in the Idjits Assemble universe, a Supernatural-Marvel Cinematic Universe fusion project between myself (Tasha) and mischievousart (Lore).
> 
> I wrote this, and Lore drew the art at the end, as a sort of gift for our Idjits Assemble tumblr followers (we just hit a hundred of you guys and this is literally the first thing I've written in the 'verse; y'all are awesome). 
> 
> Keep an eye on this 'verse, we'll be playing around in it as we work ideas out, and after the Dean/Cas Big Bang is over (which we're both involved in this year), we'll be churning stuff out more regularly. Although Lore does love playing around with character designs so there'll likely be a bunch of art over the next few months.
> 
> Feel free to follow [myself](http://disease-danger-darkness-silence.tumblr.com/), [Lore](http://mischievousart.tumblr.com/), or [Idjits Assemble](http://idjitsassemble.tumblr.com/) on tumblr. <3

 Dean almost missed her; somehow she’d changed out of her armor, probably magically like her stupid brother and _man_ , nothing could bring Dean down like mentioning Loki --

 _Anyway_ , Thor was standing in front of a bar, wearing a casual tunic and leggings and a _huge_ grin on her face; Dean cut out the accelerators on the suit, dropping toward the ground almost instantly, because Thor grinning was never, _ever_ a good thing.

“I found Thor,” he announced. “Heading in now.”

“ _Dean_ ,” and Castiel’s voice coming over the com made Dean scowl like nothing else. “We’re _trying_ to keep from alarming the populace too much. The suit attracts attention.”

“Hey, buddy, I’m _Dean Winchester_ ,” Dean interrupted. “I dunno what it was like back in the good old days, but these years, _everyone_ knows who _I_ am. If you want someone to keep a low profile, Cap, I’m _not_ the guy for the job.”

Castiel let loose with a frustrated sigh. “Just ditch the suit for pickup, Winchester, and try to keep from making a scene. Bela thinks she might have a line of sight on Wesson, so we may fly out of range for a while.”

“Aw, are you telling me I might have to survive five minutes without listening to your dulcet tones, Cas? I dunno if I can make it,” Dean said, voice innocent. He smirked to himself before bringing the suit upright and sinking quietly behind the bar. He tried, and _failed_ , to use a Dumpster for cover. Now would have been a _great_ time to be wearing the Mark V, but hey, beggars can’t be choosers. The suit was showy, that was the _point_.

“ _Christ_ ,” Gabe said, and Dean could _hear_ him rolling his eyes. “If I have to deal with the sexual tension between Captain America and The Great Iron Dick for the rest of this mission I’m asking Bobby for a goddamn _raise_.”

Bela sniffed - God, even her _breathing_ had a British accent. “Homosexual hazard pay. I bet we could talk him into vacation time.”

“Shut. _Up_ ,” Castiel commanded. Bela and Gabe laughed, clearly intending on ignoring him.

“Alright, I’m going off-com,” Dean warned them. “No flirting without me.” He hit the suit’s eject button and it spat him out, and he didn’t stumble, absolutely not, no way, _never_. A quick command to IMPALA had the suit crouched over, trying to hide as best as it could, and Dean immediately took off sprinting down to the end of the alleyway.

Thank _Christ_ , Thor was still there. She was staring into the bar’s front window, but she turned slightly at his approach and spotted him.

“Dean!” she called, waving and beaming at him. “An _alehouse_!” Which, Dean knew she’d drank _Charlie Bradbury_ under the table (no easy feat, cuz Charlie was Irish and those fuckers know how to drink), so the existence of _Midgardian alehouses_ shouldn’t be surprising to her. Also, Dean really needed to give the resident God a quick lesson in slang because alehouse? _Really_?

“Yeah, hah, _alehouse_ ,” Dean said, grinning at the bartender, who’d come outside to see why this strange woman staring into his establishment. “C’mon, we have to get going, L -- _your brother_ is on his way to New York.”

Her face clouded over. “My brother is a dangerous man, Dean. We must be careful.”

“Jesus _Christ_ ,” Dean said, slapping his hand to his face. The bartender looked, well -- _alarmed_ , which was basically the exact opposite of what Cas wanted and for once, Dean agreed with the uptight asshole: a panicked population was an in-the-way population. He let a grin spread across his face and he was pretty sure it wasn’t a very _reassuring_ smile but hey, they were kind of in a rush here.

“Come on, Thor, _try_ and blend in,” Dean whispered into her ear, still smiling, slapping a hand to her shoulder. “Act like, you know, your average Joe. We’re trying _not_ to freak people out.”

Her face twisted slightly; out of the corner of his eye Dean could see a confused expression cross her features, and if it had been any _other_ time he might have laughed, but hey -- megalomaniac, trying to destroy the world. They had a time limit.

“Can I help you, miss?” the bartender asked, scowling, and Dean realized that this bag of dicks thought Dean was Thor’s abusive boyfriend. _What the fuck_. Of _course_ he’d get like, the _one_ person in upstate New York who didn’t know who he was because honestly, Dean had a history of being abusive to _himself_ but he’d never, _ever_ hit a woman (who wasn’t trying to kill him).

Besides, Thor could _kick his ass_.

“I am Joe,” Thor said, nodding decisively.

This did nothing to alleviate the bartender’s concerns. “Excuse me?”

Dean forced a laugh out. “Jo, short for Joanna, c’mon _honey_ , we’re running late,” he said, turning and shoving her toward where the suit was stored.

“I am not honey,” Thor said. “Wait, am I supposed to be? I don’t understand.”

Dean shoved her a little bit harder. “C’mon, _Jo_ , let’s get going,” he said, pointedly. She nodded and, thank _Christ_ , seemed to get that he was trying to move her out of the view of civilians.

“Pleased to make your acquaintance!” Thor bellowed as they turned the corner. Dean shot a last look at the bartender; he looked torn between calling the cops and dashing back into the bar and locking the door behind him.

“For fuck’s _sake_ , Thor,” Dean said, burying his face in his hands as they dashed toward the now-visible suit. “Remind me to give you a crash course on pop culture whenever we beat that little shit.”

Thor - or Jo, he supposed - stared back at him, her face perplexed.

“ _Nevermind_ ,” Dean said, sighing. “C’mon, suit up, we have to be in NYC like, five minutes ago.”

“You’ve achieved time travel?” Thor asked, politely, as she hefted Mjolnir in her hands.

“Haha, _noo_ , I mean, I guess Cas is sort of a time-traveller but - yeah, no, we’re not gonna get into relativistic physics right now, we have a world to save,” Dean said. “IMPALA, c’mon, baby, open up.”

The suit did exactly as requested, the helmet popping off and the chest cavity opening wide, and Dean turned toward Thor, who was now pointing her magic hammer at the sky - which, yeah, that’s not a sentence Dean had ever wanted to think. His life was _weird_.

“You ready to do this, dude?” he asked. The helmet slammed down over his face.

“I will never be _ready_ ,” Thor said, face sad. “But I’ll do it anyway. My brother must pay for his crimes.”

“Damn skippy,” Dean said. “Hey, Cap, you there?”

“Your boyfriend’s off rescuing the Incredible Pantsless Hulk. Bela’s watching,” came Gabe’s voice, and he sounded bored. “She claims she’s keeping lookout but I wasn’t joking about him being pantsless so yeah, probably not so much.” He snorted. “You pick up Thor?”

“Yeah, I’ve got her,” Dean said, eyeballing the god as she summoned lightening and did all sorts of creepy freaky shit that he didn’t want to think too hard about. “You can call her Jo from now on, though.”

“What.”

Dean laughed. “Our resident deity picked up a nickname by accident. C’mon, _Joanna_ , let’s get moving.”

“I like this name,” Thor said, smiling. She was now fully suited up, covered in metal plating and leather. “Joanna. It’s a mighty name, the name of a warrior, yes?”

“Well, it is _now_ ,” Dean said, shooting her a thumbs up. “C’mon, buddy, we got a science experiment to wrangle.”

**Author's Note:**

> 


End file.
